So this is going to be a pretty personal one. This post is all about times that my weight has made me feel embarrassed. I think this is an important topic to cover for a couple reasons, first, I want other people to know that they’re not the only ones getting embarrassed by their weight, and second, this will be a good motivational tool for myself. It’s going to force me to relive embarrassing situations, and remind me why I want to get fit so badly.
I’ve got 2 events from the last few years that stick out in my mind as particularly embarrassing. The first was a few years ago when I went out to a club with my boyfriend and some friends only to run in to my ex. I’d put on probably around 10 kg (22 lbs) since we’d broken up. There are so many things that I’m sure went through his mind when he saw me, but the things that I think about him thinking go a little something like this, “Thank god I got out before she got fat”, “Oh, she must have been so upset about breaking up that she lost control and got fat”, “Ha ha, she got fat! I win!” It’s hard thinking about this. It’s not like I have any feelings at all for him, or care what he thinks about me, it’s just that it would have been much nicer to look amazing when I saw him. You know, in a revenge type way. You girls know what I’m talking about!
The other event that sticks out in my mind is when my boyfriend and I went out clubbing for his birthday. It was an amazing night, we hopped from club to club, and laughed and made new drunk friends all night. But there was one thing lingering in the back of my mind the whole night. I was surrounded by thin beautiful 18 year olds. Now don’t get me wrong, I know my boyfriend loves me just as I am, and I know he wasn’t even looking at these other women, but I was, and I was constantly comparing myself to them all night. I don’t care what anyone says, women compare themselves against the women around them. It doesn’t have to make them bitchy or jealous, it’s just what we do. So, when I’m out clubbing with my boyfriend on our cruise in February, I want to be able to rank myself above at least SOME of the women around. I never want to be the “At least I’m not as big as her” girl again!
Well, that was fun to relive and share…. NOT! But at least it’s out there, and it’s already motivating me to get fit and healthy for our upcoming cruise! I hope this has helped some of you, and I urge you to think about or write down the times that your weight has embarrassed you. You don’t have to share it with anyone, but use it as a motivational tool! Make yourself some promises (I will never be as big as I was the last time I saw my ex again!) and make them happen!